Focus

Dec. 14th, 2010 07:16 pm
aoz0ra: (Default)
[personal profile] aoz0ra
Found this ...something I scribbled at 7 December, 8:52am.  Yes, apparently I had even dated it.  Hmm

"I wonder how they do it.  Keeping focused, I mean.  It's not quite simple for me..

Look, I'm writing this when I should be studying, ain't that enough proof?

I miss the familiar.  I miss looking out of my long bedroom windows, curtains tossed aside and the watching the stock-stillness of the pre-dawn scenery - a plain of grasses, not a blade moving in the absence of wind, under the deep blue sky that lightens and brightens as first a glow then a dab of gold peeks forth from the horizon, and the sky becomes a working canvas with fingers of gold moving through, smudging, illuminating the streaky clouds, the palm fronds, tiled rooftops - and in welcome, the birds break into symphony, at first hesistant then in full orchestra.
And the world awakes.

I don't feel like I have woken up yet.  Yet I don't feel like I have slept either.  Stasis is not a good place to dwell in especially when one has moved to university - Progress! Progress! - ah, but where has my heart for this gone to.. 
Faught- petty thoughts I must extinguish; stop the comparisions, the sulking;  CONCENTRATE

Viruses, eukaryotes, metabolism, biotechnology - within 4 hours, i have a test.  I should sleep. 
There's no way I can finish listening to this playlist either
o_o 15.5 hours..."

omg the dysfunctional distraction in my thoughts.

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aoz0ra

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